Not sure what the fuck I watched last night. Something made in Mexico about a parentless beauty who moves into a convent, befriends a girl named Alucarda. The two of them become best chums immediately, and frollick into the woods where some hunchback who looks like the Burger King "King" mascot lives in the woods nearby. Shortly after, Lucifer-summoned demons possess them, and their dress code quickly shifts to "strictly Birthday Suits," with some lesbian loving sprinkled in the pot. Exorcisms go haywire, and the whole thing ends in a fire-blazer of a splendid finale, with Alucarda incinerating nuns at will and quite possible influencing Stephen King (see the similarly roast-and-toast climaxes of Carrie and Firestarter).
And a cinematic record is set for Most Female Screams Ever Heard In A Single Movie.
Cue end credits.
In other words, Alucarda boasts the quintessential recipe for nonsensical awesomeness.
Alucarda is another prime example of a film that makes me wish I was around during the 1970s-heyday of exploitation and boundary-less, what-the-fuck-is-going-on moviemaking. When watching films from that era, there's such a feeling of insecurity as a viewer. Anything can happen in front of you, and the filmmakers were taking chances and risks left and right, so even when poorly executed the festivities captivated. Or repulsed, depending on your stance.
Can't even recall where I first heard about this one. Probably while reading one of my precious horror websites, where I'm sure it was praised for its esoteric, blood-coated bullshit aura.
Call this a "King sandwich"
Don't ask....that horned son-of-a-bitch chaperones a satanic outdoor orgy, so you know he's on some other shit
Just watch this, and see for yourself the blasphemic insanity I've experienced:
.jpeg)
No comments:
Post a Comment