The Hills Have Douchebags

I fucking hate The Hills. Worst show on TV right now, possibly ever. Hell, in my eyes, it is the worst show in the history of television. Totally staged. Boring as can be. Polluted with the biggest jerkoff characters this side of Big Brother.

My roommate is watching it, and being that our Internet connection is in our living room, I have no choice but to feel its wrath of putridity (think I just made up a word there....that doesn't sound like an actual word, right?) as I type away on my trusty laptop.

Spencer Pratt, or whatever his last name is, could quite possibly be the biggest douchebag to ever grace an idiot box monitor. I'd seriously pay a cool $100 just to kick the shit out of him. He could even try fighting back, it'd make no diff. He'd stand no chance against my pent-up rage against his show that has played a mammoth part in destroying pop culture.

I have so many friends who make it a weekly routine to watch this stupid show. Most times, catching every subsequent repeat. And I thought my obsessive viewing of Family Guy reruns was a bit much. Family Guy is like Rasputin compared to The Hills.

....

Oh dear God....some asinine new 'reality' show called Exiled has just come on after The Hills Have Douchebags. Not as ass-awful, but pretty darn close. Why does MTV suck so royally? I remember the days when MTV had quality programming such as Yo! MTV Raps, Dead at 21, The Head, Beavis & Butthead, Liquid TV, The Grind, and shit hosted by one of my first full-on celebrity crushes, MTV veejay Idalis. What a smokin' hot dame she was. My lord.



Remember her? Oh, how I loved thee....

How about this? MTV used to be the home of such genius moments as what you're about to watch. "Back in the days, when I was young, I'm not a kid anymore, but some days I sit and wish I was a kid again....."